On: Holiday Lights

The Most Famous Holiday Tree in Chicago, in the Walnut Room of Macy's, formerly Marshall Fields

On Holiday Lights:  Slinging Fa-La-La-La-La
Colleen Rogers

My husband and I, around this time of year, begin our annual neighborhood perusal of holiday home displays.  We rate each visual offering with Simon-esque precision and a sartorial eye.  The homes that fail to meet our exacting holiday display standards get the ultimate harshest critique in a dismissive one word epitaph...
..."SLUNG".    

Mind you, my husband and I do not construct elaborate lighting arrangements for display on our own home.  We prefer to "keep it simple" with a wreath on the door, solitary candles in the window, and some door frame trim.  We like to claim this as our taste for simple, natural elegance, but I believe laziness is more of a factor than we are likely to consider.  In spite of the hypocrisy herein foretold, we do have an established rating system that you are welcome to try out this season...

1.    No blending the spiritual with the secular...

Your home loses evaluation points if you have a Nativity scene and Mickey Mouse together on your front lawn...no exceptions!

2.      No color mixing...

If your family insists on colored lights outside (ugh), then DO NOT mix them with white lights.  

3.    No inflatables...

If things are inflated and then left deflated on your lawn, know that the front of your home looks like a dive bar at last call.

4.    Cover your bush...

If your lighting nets do not cover your entire exterior bushes, be assured that your holiday bikini is showcasing your hedge rolls…and, finally, the most significant holiday lighting tip of all...

    5.  Be sure that your lights are not SLUNG...

Make sure your Winter-Fourth Fireworks' strands are neatly wrapped lovingly around each tree, and that Monsoon Winds and Weighty Snows have no impact on the precise the Trail of Lights that coil each branch.  Appear these stable displays, enduring the joys of the holiday season, fated to be removed by NO LATER THAN THE SECOND WEEK OF JANUARY.  If not as such exacted, you will hear my husband and I cackle our own jingling carol as we drive by your house..."Slung, slung, slung, oh how slung, slinging all the way..."

By the way, if you take offense, please be sure to note our Goodwill Override Rule...

 ...you may disregard any of the aforementioned rules if you are entertaining the whimsy and delight of children under 100.

Happiness at the onset of the Holiday Season!





  

On Aging: Plus and Minus

On Aging:  Plus and Minus
Colleen Rogers 

The Minus Column

I wake in the morning with a refreshing new ache or pain, one that shocks me to the core, propelling me to assess whether or not this is the one, the final.  Every new bump or wrinkle is an enemy of the state, and I do not understand how my form does not seem to align with my thought patterns.  It is as if I had been expelled into another dimension while at rest, only to wake with invasions and probes altering my own familiar.  I groan, creak, and function--but I must now make adjustments.  I go more slowly on the stair steps, am more cautious on sidewalks.  I feel the pitying stares from those younger, who mentally seem to calculate my time remaining.  I sense that they wish to push me along and not deal with the discomfort of knowing that this is fated for them as well.  I am a living reminder of mortality--that of their grandparents, parents and, ultimately, their own.  I am the Grim Reaper, but it's not Halloween.  I do not seek to roller coaster their discomfort.  On the contrary, I want to learn their computer tips, their dance crazes, their vernacular.  But, when I attempt to emulate now, I have moved from "cool" to "crazy old lady" on their assessment spectrum.  Pop culture is no longer the jewel of my schemata.  I am the outsider, no longer moving and shaking the spin of the world.  My ideas, suggestions, and insights are now received with gentle smiles and condescending nods.  It is a sudden sidestep, but a significant one.  You suddenly ghost fade from mattering.  Even though the predictions you proffered do indeed materialize (and you could have saved them much grief if only they'd listened), it is all for naught.  They have to make the errors of their age while you squelch every "I-told-you-so".  You are no longer the world's host--you now are being served the courtesy plate of soft foods.

The Plus Column

I wake in the morning with a delightful boldness, not worrying as much about being offensive or insulting.  My delivery of opinions, however harsh, is now more frequently excused due to my age.  I do not self-censor as I once did, and it is much easier to say what I truly think without reprisal.  My intention is not to be hurtful, but to be openly honest.  My Southern mother-in-law, who was "coyly expressive", used to tell people with whom she disagreed to "die in a pile".  The freedom to send people with malcontent swiftly offsite is a delicious benefit of aging, especially for those of us who tend to stifle.  This newfound daring also spills into trying the new and the feared.  I have been encouraged and egged on make more attempts at the unknown.  After all, winked a friend, "a life sentence in prison is a rather short term for us".  The desire to do the things that were once eliminated, as a trade-off for the acquisitions needed to build a life, are now revisited.  There is a desire to travel, rekindle connections once shelved, and have less routine experiences.  Checking off the bucket list items of dreams-in-rotation suddenly becomes a living, activated turnstile.  The baubles once accrued are dispensed to family members, or antique shops, so that a life of minimal maintenance can be enjoyed.  It is no longer about the "stuff" or the showiness of what has been amassed.  The focus has shifted to the attempt to establish good health and the enjoyment of time.  The jolt of aging is a shock, something not instructed, with no coping mechanisms shared due to our own parents' efforts to spare us some of the jarring downsides.  Like most life experiences, though, our approach in shifting temporary derailments to regain life's balance is what matters.   

Our perspectives need to turn from what is lost to what is next.


Meme herein:  Old_f71235_464473-min.jpg

On: Thanksgiving

On:  Thanksgiving
Colleen Rogers

Spent a lovely Thanksgiving Holiday with my beloved sister and her family today.  In all that is reflective of the season, I noted these:

The crowning of our shares 

It is the tradition of most American families to showcase the offerings of the most dexterous chefs on this day.  The auntie who makes the best pie, the grandmother who rises the best biscuits, the father whose turkey preparation is legendary.  We send in our foodie PhD's, who gladly prep the best of each creation so that we may divide and share with gratitude. 

The diversity of our offerings 

It is not imperative that we remain rigid with our menu 
d' juor.  We can adapt and personalize our anticipated delights by adding tamales or macaroni and cheese if these are indicative of our family's most beloved flavors.  Our dinner spirits the uniqueness of our cultures, but can be shared with anyone invited.  
    
The opulence of our consumption

It is recognized on this day that abundance and  consumption will be featured center stage.  We know that with each blessing of which we partake, and in our heavy consumption, there has been hard work to inspire our feast.

The defiance of our selection

It is expected that some of us will not indulge.  We have a right to deny or refute this celebration to honor our own cultural beliefs or dietary concerns.  We can hold firm against temptation, and are not to be condemned for this stance by those also seated at the table.

The unification of our multiplicity

It is, through our connections this day, apparent that family members and friends come to the table bringing different ages, genders, backgrounds, and sensitivities.  We honor each other and are unified with respect and acceptance. Throughout the toasts, stories, memories, and laughter we share and weave our experiences until our plates are cleared.

And so, it is with America this day and always...

We... 

--recognize the service of our best
--respect the diversity of our cultural gifts
--honor blessings achieved through hard work
--acknowledge our right to peacefully defy
--attempt to unify in spite of our differences

Image from:

http://www.kiddyhouse.com/Thanksgiving/









 

On Teaching: Top Ten Reasons Teachers Leave

On Teaching:  Top Ten Reasons Teachers Leave
Colleen Rogers 

As both a retiring teacher and a newly hired rookie teacher within a one year time span, I have had the unique ability to assess with a seasoned eye the reasons why so many fresh-faced, enthusiastic young teachers opt to leave our profession so quickly.  With a retention rate of less than fifty percent of new teachers remaining in the classroom beyond five years, I have tried to evaluate why things have flipped so significantly.

I have determined that these ten issues serve as the primary, fundamental indicators to trigger the mass exodus of teachers, and the increased shortfall of instructional personnel deciding to work with our children.  Each indicator listed is in no particular order of impact--what fuels one teacher's departure in a District may leave no scars on another teacher employed somewhere else.

1.  Lack of instructional supplies or resources 

There is no teacher on the planet who does not invest some of their own salary on students' instructional supplies.  Markers, folders, pens, pencils and the like cut into every teacher's annual salary.  No teacher passes a writing tool laying on the ground without picking it up for future use--these are the BOGOs of educators.  Teachers dole out unaccounted for "invisible" expenses--buying kids winter coats, paying for students to attend field trips so that they are not left behind, etc. The public is not aware of these items, but the "hidden expenses of teaching" are sometimes burdensome to college educated professionals at the lower end of the totem pole of a professional's salary schedule.  

Additionally, many teachers must arrive to school with a Plan B in mind. Functional copy machines, reliable presentation equipment, usable computers, etc., can never be counted on as a certainty.  Generally, these commodities are in a state of disrepair, and irregular availability is a workplace annoyance unknown to other professionals in a business setting.  Rarely do business office staff face this level of inconsistency in accessing their "tools of the trade".

2.  Working conditions 

Having worked in a building constructed around the turn of the century, my own classroom has been frequently visited by mice AND cockroaches.  I have had brown water drip on my head in restrooms, and have witnessed bloody fights and projectile vomiting.  Students often eat lunch in teacher work areas, and we are subjected to every non-contained viral illness and wormy lice infestation that you can imagine.  Even teachers who work in state-of-the-art buildings are not immune to the grime factor of a crusty hand-delivered homework assignments.

3.  State mandates

Some Great Oz at the State Boards of Education inevitably blocks engaging lessons to be shared with students by requiring state mandated testing, which is done with puzzling frequency at the elementary levels. It is difficult to witness students struggling, sitting in chairs for extended periods of time, to take MAP or PARCC tests. The stated purpose of these tests is to garner data, determine student ability levels, and plan targeted goals for students, which ironically, may not be reached due to the loss of curriculum time, the ultimate result of testing. 

4.  Lack of administrative support 

When I was a young teacher, Principals and Assistant Principals were Educational Warlords.  I remember once hearing a Principal tell a parent to "get out of my building".  Teachers were covered.  No parent or student would dare "act a fool" anywhere near the school building without the full wrath of an administrator.  Now, with threats of legal action by parents or unfavorable media coverage, administrators tread lightly and generally opt to admonish or throw teachers under the bus to save their own hide.  The trend of "parent pacification" has taken the administrative back-up away from teachers, who now fend off parent sieges on their own.  Today's administrators feel that their hands are tied by school boards that don't understand what high level maverick support is needed for teachers in the trenches.  For an administrator to expel a student requires a considerable amount of corroborating data to convince skittish school boards of the need for such an "extreme" action. 

5.  Teacher review systems 

For already burdened teachers who provide excessive hours and "overtime" for which they are not compensated, a review citation of "needs improvement" seems to be a serious professional "slap in the face".  Many teachers feel that such a rating fails to look at the substantial dedication and service they provide the school and community, and instead focuses on "nitpicking" the teacher's Achilles' heel.  Covertly, this administrative downgrading can actually be done to slide someone into the teacher's job, reinforce an administrator's exchange of power over goodwill, and therefore demonstrate the failure of cumbersome and ineffective personnel rating systems.  In any case, the loss of validation and affirmation impacts teachers' willingness to continue in District classrooms.

6.  Parental reactive sets 

Many parents are like Storm Troopers when it comes to schools.  Instead of assuming that teachers are right in correcting the behaviors of their child in the classroom, the focus has shifted to believing that teachers have done their child grave educational injustices, causing their student irreparable psychological damage.  Parents now appear at schools demanding an audience with any teacher sans an appointment, after having been texted by their child at recess about the teacher's transgression.  It is now imperative for teachers to keep copious records of student misdeeds and parent contacts as backup and professional self-preservation.

7.  Student classroom and school behaviors 

Students have undoubtedly been more combative and threatening since I began teaching.  The incidences of bullying and assault have increased tremendously.  The fear of being attacked crosses the mind of many teachers.  I, personally, have seen desks being thrown at teachers, teachers being choked by their school ID lanyard, and teachers being shoved down a flight of stairs.  This does not include the incidents wherein teachers attempt to break up student fights.  In one of my own classrooms remains the chalkboard bullet hole from a student who attempted to shoot his Math teacher there.  I suspect that many teachers, who are beginning to start families of their own, are reticent to remain in environments where sporadic violence erupts.  

8. Limited alternative placement or social resources 

Many students are coming to school with a myriad of social issues that are beyond the scope of reach for one classroom teacher with 25 students in the room.  This year, in my classroom, I had one boy suffering from leukemia, one homeless girl, and one girl whose father was recently arrested for pedophilia--her older sister was one of his victims.  These are the students about whose life traumas I KNEW.  I am certain many other students had serious problems that went unaddressed.  Even with awareness, it is difficult to find the level of counseling, social service resources, and ongoing support required for these students daily.  School counselors, social workers and nurses are stretched very thin in any school building.
  
9.  Professional Downgrades

I have listened to the adage "those that can't, teach" being touted more now than ever.  They say:  Teaching is something for "those who want three months off in the summer" (eye roll).  It's like being a "babysitter", or like working at a "daycare center", etc.  The "art" of teaching is not respected anymore.  There is no acknowledged magic in getting over twenty seventh graders to line up in a hall without swatting each other.  There is no miracle in getting a class engaged in acting out a book you all read together.  When your other friends listen to what you do daily, they don't see the mastery in it.  They don't see how clever and dodgy you are for switching a lesson on the spot because a student asked a compelling sidebar question.  They think you're foolish for all the extra work you do for which you don't get paid.  When I was younger, I'd smile at them, and know that the "World's Greatest Teacher" notes from students were "my little secret"--incomparable compensation greater than any cash bonus.  I don't know that it is that way any longer--the isolated AH-HA moments when all students in unison "get it", and the few times when students send notes of gratitude don't seem to outweigh other educational issues that face classroom teachers.  When we align the investment of our educational time and training with our friends' cushier lifestyle, we wonder sometimes if it was worth our sacrifice for those rare moments of joyful connection with our classes.

10.  The Media Age

Of late, numerous postings of teachers caught in moments of exasperation, political incorrectness, or out-and-out unprofessional conduct have been filmed by students in the classroom and posted for what I call "Teachertainment".  The idea, here, is to provoke the teacher to appear in an educational form of the T.V. show "Snapped".  The students guffaw, poke fun at, verbally abuse, or physically pummel the teacher, all with the intent of posting the event on social media.  Generally, the ensuing embarrassment causes the teachers' departure or, depending on the nature of the infraction, the swift dismissal of the instructor.  The transmission of the alleged "transgression" causes an immediate need for District response and reaction.  Media is a double-edged sword when it comes to the classroom.  On the positive, it can be an effective instructional tool, or a system to monitor inappropriate conduct.  Negatively, though, it can be a way to humiliate faculty or classmates and put control in the hands of intimidating students.  There are few teachers that wish to engage in the heckling world of "Teachertainment". 

Final Thoughts

It is imperative that teachers begin to express and share the concerns that restrict the preservation of our profession.  With open dialogue, we can confront each of these issues, reduce teacher bailout, keeping effective, creative teachers in the classroom.