On: Teacher Tales--Email Logs, Volume 5

Teacher Tales:
A Compilation of Email Logs From
The Records of A Public High School Teacher, Volume 5

A Primer For the Secretary of Education's 
Review and Consideration


Entry #36

"After School Brawl"

March 20, 2014 7:32 AM

"Hi, hon,

...evidently there were 23 kids fighting after school yesterday..we are on a no pass, no cell phone policy today..."

Excerpts from the Assistant Principal's Memo:

"No students should be in the hallways during non-passing periods for any reason unless they are being escorted by security.  Requests for a security escort should only be for Dean and Counselor requests or medical emergencies.  In the event of a medical emergency, please notify the nurse at ext. #@&%."

In addition, we have requested additional police presence before, during and after school ...

Lastly, thank you to the many staff members who assisted today in helping quell today's events." 

Entry #37

"Forgery Board"

March 20, 2014 11:37 AM

From a local newspaper...

"@#$%^&*(), the former District president who was removed from office because of a 29-year-old felony conviction, said Wednesday he wants to be reappointed to the School Board.

Such circumstances are possible, @#$%^&*() said because he said an @#$% County, *()), judge issued an order granting an expungement of his conviction in 1985 for aiding, inducing or causing a forgery."

Entry #38

"Window Pain"

March 20, 2014 11:12 AM

"Hi, Hon,

I got displaced from my classroom today during lunch--a student in A.'s class called her a B@#ch, stormed out of the classroom, slammed the door, and shattered the glass pane of the door frame. The Assistant Principal came and asked me if they could move her students to my classroom while they cleaned up the glass.  When A. came back to the class, she was crying and they had to get a sub for her class.  Good thing we only have one more day till vacation."

Entry #39

"Hypocrite"

March 17, 2014 10:03 AM

"Hi, Hon, 

...I narrowly avoided a major faux pas in the attendance office.  I scanned a girl's ID, and when I gave her the tardy slip from the machine, it showed "Hypocrite" as being her first name.  Thankfully, I remembered to pronounce her name "Hip-AH-cree-tea" when I had to tell her she had a Saturday detention..."

Entry #40

March 11, 2014 11:56 AM

"Hi, Hon,

Kelly texted me and said that today was Janet Reno Day at her school for some unknown, random reason.  At my school, it is Kriss Kross Day, so some kids have their clothes on backwards...that's so...Wiggetty, Wiggetty, Wiggetty, Wiggetty, Whack...uh, huh"
 

 Kriss Kross Image From:

http://www.metalsucks.net/2015/03/24/its-the-metal-cover-of-kris-kross-jump-you-never-knew-you-needed/

On: Frozen Fashion

Frozen Fashion
Colleen Rogers

While walking around our world-class city last week, I was noticing some of the trendy attire worn by the young professional women, comparing their "fashion chic" with my "retirement casual" sensibilities.  The method to my madness in observing was to have a selective road map for an "upping-my-style-game".

My current designer of choice from Milan, Comi Fourt Ahblei, seeks to retire his fashion house, leaving behind a legacy as Chief Fashion Designer for the cast of "Dynasty".  So I, now, must Goodwill what remains of my pumped-up-shoulder-padded jackets, and transition from the 80's wardrobe of Kris Jenner to the classy re-invented panache of Caitlyn. 

I have always been a laughable dresser, so bad, in fact, that my when my outfits have been decent, selfies have been requested.  One of my worst "fashion don'ts" was when I wore an 

A much smarter version of my sweatshirt

oversized sweatshirt, 
with a large Santa decal,
and the words "HO, HO, HO" emblazoned 
across the front.. 
in gold glitter...which
I wore to work...and 
it was not "Ugly Sweater Day".  

The worst thing about this fashion faux pas, though, was that...

until I heard cackling as I walked my perkiness down the hall at work, did I surmise the alternate significance of the phrase "HO, HO, HO".  Embarrassingly clueless.

Nonetheless, here follows my little comparative analysis on Generational Fashion, and the inception of my upgrades...

Hairstyles...
Millennials--Pony Tails or long, windblown locks
Boomer Gals--Boy-Short Dos, Wedgy Bobs, or Long, Homeless Grey Dryness

Jacket Selections...
Millennials--Short and "smart"
Boomer Gals--Long, boxy, and full of down or shoulder pads (sometimes with menopausal linings that zip out)

Shirt Selections...
Millennials--Fitted and Athletic
Boomer Gals--Loose-as-a-Goose "Blouses" or Concert T-Shirts (i.e., Grateful Dead stuff)

Pant Selections...
Millennials--Leggings in Regimented Black
Plus Size Women--Leggings, in eye-blinding Wallpaper, Leopard, or Geometric Prints 
Boomer Gals--Jeans, for our eternally rebellious nature

Shoe Choices...
Millennials--Athletic wear or ankle boots, heels if they're from another country, or are hookers
Boomer Gals--Coffin-resembling, lined, stogey shoes with straps, no laces...similar to children's foot ware from the turn-of-the-century

Purse Accessories...
Millennials--Backpacks
Boomer Gals--Totes, with treats for the Grand
kids

My conclusion is that the key is to an enviable look is...

wearing smartly loud accessories.  

If you're my age, divert your lack of style and crepey neck with one distracting statement piece.  Go for a large piece of jewelry, bold eye wear, Isadora Duncan scarves, blood red lipstick, or even that flipping Mary Tyler Moore beret.   

Look as wild and mismatched as you dare...if you do, you will be pegged as eccentrically fashionable or gloriously wealthy.

It's a win-win.















 


 

On: Teacher Tales--Email Logs, Volume 4

Teacher Tales:
A Compilation of Email Logs From
The Records of A Public High School Teacher, Volume 4

A Primer For the Secretary of Education's 
Review and Consideration

Entry #30…

"Door Rubbers"

May 24, 2014 7:51 AM 

"Hi, Hon,

...made it here okay, but the Senior pranks have already begun.  Ms. H. found a condom tied to her door knob already today.  Fortunately, it wasn't used, and they didn't place it OVER the door knob.  Still gross..."

Entry #31

"Are you packed yet?"

 May 8, 2014 9:15 AM

"Hi, hon

It is Teacher Appreciation Week, so they had coffee and doughnuts for us in the faculty lounge.  Nice...

As I am there eating my pink doughnut, Ms. J. asks to speak with me.  She says that the Union has decided that because next year is my last, that I DON'T HAVE TO MOVE CLASSROOMS, and that the Assistant Principal would be speaking with me privately.  Thanks for the intel, BUT I'VE ALREADY PACKED, EVERYONE!!!  WHEN WERE YOU GONNA TELL ME?  ON THE LAST DAY OF SCHOOL???!!!

I'm trying to be a team player by prepping the room for the next teacher, and NOW you're informing me that I don't have to move at all, after I have already emptied closets, drawers, file cabinets, hauled stuff home, and packed fourteen boxes...Not nice...

F#%k Teacher Appreciation Week..." 


Entry #32

"Viva, Pedro"

 May 5, 2014 12:26 PM

"Hi, hon,

...trying to do a Cinco de mayo writing activity

with the students.  The kids have to pick an historical character (Benito Juarez, Napoleon III, General Zaragoza, etc.), or they can choose to be a Mexican citizen from the mid-1800's.  They are to write a one day journal page expressing their feelings about the events leading up to or immediately following the Battle of Puebla  from the perspective of the "character" they picked.  If they picked a Mexican citizen, they had to give that person a Spanish name for their journal page...so...

I get this impassioned, patriotic journal entry about the defense of life, liberty, and personal property against the French from a Mexican citizen known as... Pedro...Pedro HENDERSON..."  

FOOTNOTE:  

In the following class, the next impassioned Mexican citizen was known as "Jenny Patel"...

Entry #33

"Induction Junction"

April 29, 2014 1:10 PM

"Hi, hon,

...six more kids got added to the Induction list, which means I need to do six more certificates, get the students' pictures and bios, give them permission slips, change the Power point and program, etc.  While I am doing all of this, a transfer student decided to write HAPPY BLOOD DAY in red on his packet on the present progressive tense.  That, of course, necessitated me stopping what I was doing to pay a visit to the school psychologist with the paper in question.  Teaching."

Entry #34

"Fruity Pathogens"

April 16, 2014 11:48 AM

"Hi, hon,

In first period, I didn't see one of my students put a glass bottle of tropical soda underneath her desk.  The boy behind her didn't see it, either--he shoved his snowshoe-sized feet under her desk, and shattered the bottle to the floor, dispensing glass and fruity punch all over the room.  I had to move the kids from the area, get paper towels, and shove the glassy, fruity stew to one area until the janitress came in with brooms, mops, etc.  She was not happy--she shot me the evil eye during cleanup.  It truly did look like a CSI crime scene, though.  Glad I was already taking super antibiotics,  because I, of course, pricked my finger while keeping the kids away from the swill.  Hope antibiotics are an anecdote for evil eye, too."

Entry #35

"Urban Dictionary"

April 15, 2014 11:55 AM

"Hi, hon,

Contents of a note confiscated in my classroom:

See, I was walkin' down the hall and I saw this girl with a fatty.  I was like damn, who is that?  Shorty can back it up on me.  Then she turned around.  I seen the cutest piece of meat.  I was like, 'there goes my bady...' (Usher mode)

My thoughts:  Wonder if she will end up being his Prom date?

My Required Urban Dictionary 
Interpretative Assist:

fatty. adj. a massive but nicely shaped ass

Bady.  A spelling of baby for people (usually people who think they are gangsters) who are particularly retarded.


Image of My Fantasy Pink Doughnut Courtesy of: 
https://www.pinterest.com/pin/528469337511426579

Cinco de mayo Image Courtesy of:
https://thenib.com/cinco-de-mayo-isn-t-what-you-think-it-is

On: Phobic-ering

Phobic-ering
Colleen Rogers

In my random, meandering ruminations today, I thought I would consider ranking my phobias by fear-tensity.   

So, I came up with the following list (with number one being my greatest terror, and number three being the least fear-inspiring)...here goes...

1.  Blood draws (not shots, though)
2.  Mice and Rats (or any other scurrying animal with a long tail)
3.  Worms (but not snakes)

I had an honorable mention short list, too, which included  clowns, heights, and open closet doors at night where I sleep.

You are probably laughing hysterically right about now at the nonsensical, laser-specific nature of my list.  You are also probably thinking that I might require intensive residential therapy.  Be that as it may, many of us do have some irrational fears.  

Even though the National Institute of Mental Health reports that only eight percent of us have such phobias, everyone I know mentions something that makes them a little queasy and uncomfortable.  Many of the symptoms people experience with phobias include nausea, trembling, rapid heartbeat, and a preoccupation with the feared object.

Phobias tend to be divided into categories--fears of the natural environment, fears relating to animals, fears of medical treatments, and fears related to a specific situation.  Women are primarily the phobic ones, so it seems.  

I was surprised to discover that virtually any object or situation can be a source of a phobia.  The last time I went to have blood drawn and shared the reason for my extremely sweaty palms, the intake nurse tried to reassure me by revealing that she was claustrophobic.  

The shocker phobia reveal for me, though, was when the phlebotomist explained that she could never stuff her own Thanksgiving turkey because she was truly physically afraid of putting her hand inside the bird. 

I found myself choking a chuckle over the absolute ridiculousness of her hilarious phobia.   

Really, now, who is actually afraid of stuffing their own Thanksgiving turkey?

Then, I thought about a clown drawing my blood in the closet of a skyscraper with a nest of mice and worms on his head.  Hope I can sleep tonight. 
 



Image from:
https://www.wikihow.com/Tell-if-Your-Fear-Is-a-Phobia



 

On: Teacher Tales--Email Logs, Volume 3

Teacher Tales:
A Compilation of Email Logs From
The Records of A Public High School Teacher, Volume 3

A Primer For the Secretary of Education's 
Review and Consideration

Entry #22…

"Ducks Amuck"

April 21, 2014 9:45 AM 

Memo from an Administrator

Subject:  Courtyard Ducks

"...The ducks are back and have a nest with 13 eggs located directly under the gazebo.  I know some of you use this area for instructional purposes, but please refrain from using this area until they (the ducks) have hatched and moved on." 

Entry #23 

"Flint, Michigan"

April 7, 2014 1:25 PM

Memo from the Wellness Committee Chair

Subject:  Water in the Faculty Lounge

"  The water dispenser in the Faculty Lounge is dirty.  The filter has not been changed in over a decade.  We are currently investigating the situation...sorry for the inconvenience."

Entry #24 

"Hot Seat"

February 5, 2014 12:13 PM

News Article:

(Special Election for Vacant District School Board Seat)

"Perhaps you could come up with an understanding about holding an election, a way in which people interested in the position could present their credentials,"  ****** told the gathering of a half-dozen attorneys--each representing different factions in the fight over control of the School Board. 

Entry #25

"Dead Mouse"

June 2, 2014   7:35 AM (Still traumatized, out-of-sequence log due to PTSD) 

"Hi, Hon--

Just got here--dead mouse right outside my classroom near that locker, you know, the one where the weave is trailing out.  The mouse probably came from you-know-whose classroom hoard.  The Assistant Principal removed it...best Assistant Principal EVER!  After the mouse incident, one of the other teachers asked me, because of the way I'm dressed today, if I was working at a Clinique counter later.  What an a$$ sombrero!"

Entry #26

"Theft Prevention"

June 3, 2013 11:10 AM

From Our Union Representative

"Please make sure you lock up anything you wouldn't want to see go missing.  Take home all personal property if at all feasible.  This year I will head my own advice, as last year I lost all my posters, wall coverings, etc." 

Entry #27

"Precautionary Drill"

May 27, 2014 7:35 AM

"Hey, Hon...

Looks like my ninth period class and I have to hide in a corner today as a precautionary drill."
  
"Reactionary Quill"

May 26, 2014 9:02 PM

From An Administrator..

"There was a shooting in ***** this morning at approximately 11:00.  It did not involve any of our students,, but the victims that incurred non-life- threatening injuries were related to two of our students..."

Entry #28

"Girl, Interrupted"

May 23, 2014 8:05 AM

"Hi, Hon, 

Guess who is suspended until May 27?  :) "

Entry #29

"Jamaican Flower"

May 21, 2014 11:42 AM

"Hi, Hon,

One of the Seniors decided to commemorate her graduation with a new tattoo...she got called into the Dean's Office today because her tattoo of choice, a "Jamaican Flower" was, in actuality, a  marijuana plant.  

According to her, she was misled by the tattoo artist, and will be demanding her money back.

Whoopsies!  Reason #98 why you need to stay sober on Prom Weekend."
  

On: Date Days

On:  Date Days

Colleen Rogers

My husband and I, now in our 60’s, have a little “Date Day” each Monday afternoon.  A quiet lunch, then some coffee (and maybe dessert) at our favorite Coffee Bar is an “outsourced” pause in our week, during which we just enjoy each other’s company. 

I think about the evolution of our “Date Days” over the thirty plus years we have known each other.   I am grateful for these memories and for the evolution of our time together.  Every couple has their own story, but there are truly commonalities in all of our romances.  When I speak to other couples, I sense a definite continuum in the trajectory of all the “Date Days” in each of our individual relationships.

When my husband and I met in our twenties, for example, our “Date Days” were grand—there were fancy dinners, careful dress-ups, roses, and the lovely vamped excitement of passionate kisses and whispered plans for a next rendezvous.  There was the thrilling roller coaster line of anxiety that coincided with a peek over the cliff-of-future-plans.  The fear of the tentative finality of our connection rode shotgun with the possibility of a significant fork in a life-path. 

In those early days, even a low-maintenance woman like myself stepped up her best-impression-game with an armory of perfumes and lipsticks.  Any less-refined male counterpart decidedly learned to open doors and pull out chairs for their lady fair, and wondered all night if a tie was straight.  Chess pawns we were back then in all these high stakes games of life partner Uno. 

As we (and our friends) finally wed and decided to build

families, many of us balanced child-rearing with “Couple Alone Time”.  We  began to approach “Date Day” as though it were a Getaway Strategy Session at the White House.  Every couple procured a sub (a babysitter or grandparent) who would uphold the family fort in parentis logo.  The sub, of course, required a well-documented Agenda of Expectations. 

Offspring’s bedtimes and snacks were detailed, and fixed House Rules and Codes of Conduct were briefed before a couple’s departure on “Date Day”.  “Date Day” activities generally included drinking and/or absorbing the comforting affirmations of another couple.   This “buddy-couple” provided sound parenting advice and/or humorous barbs about their own family lives and misfortunes.

If couples chose to “go-it-alone” on “Date Day”, the event became a problem-resolution team workshop.  The primary “romantic utterance” whispered at the outing was “what-are-we-going-to-do-about”…  The goal of “Date Day” evolved into an opportunity to work out some of the more pressing household issues without children underfoot.  Finances, home improvement plans, family dynamics, and the soap opera of exes got “hashed out”.

Ultimately, these “Date Days” concluded with a debriefing and report from the subs, a tucking in and checking on children, and an exhausted snuggle snooze in the Parental Boudoir.  So many “Date Days” over the years morphed into “Family Time” without even the whisper of notice or concern.

In our retirement “Date Days”, my husband and I have relished the continuation of the complexities of our coupling.  We recall the fiery passion of our earliest “Date Day” adventures.  We also remember “Date Days” that served to strategize and establish our “home fires”.  So now, in our more subdued and quiet “Date Days”, we review the glowing ember of “together lives” well-lived.

 

On: The Crazy Mystery of Dogs

On:  The Crazy Mystery of Dogs

Colleen Rogers

Last night our dog was crazy.  We took him along to someone’s house for a visit, and he was literally the kid who ultimately gets kicked off a plane. We were given the okay to bring him to the family’s home, and he had been at the house before without incident, so we foresaw no trouble.  The family had two dogs of their own, with whom our dog had always gotten along with swimmingly, but this time he was the proverbial Hound from Hell. 

His infractions included humping their family’s dog, attempting to snatch a near fatal piece of chocolate cake, and eating the host-dog’s food.  He never once sat down, and he acted like a fourteen-year-old boy in a hooker den the whole evening.

He is our second family dog, another beagle, and most likely a rescued lab dog.  All dogs have that “how I found my master” story.  In his case, my sister-in-law lead him to us.  Our first dog had crossed the rainbow bridge, and raw grief did not enable me any active search for a “replacement” pet.  My husband, on the other hand, had a more wildly ready heart. 

My sister-in-law, a dog rescue volunteer in another state, had sent my husband the now infamous “you gotta see this dog” video.  I could not bring myself to watch, but my husband could not get over the charm of the most bow-legged beagle on the planet.  What else could he do but pack the car and drive four hours to greet the little guy?  In one of his rare moments of illogical whimsy, he indeed traveled the four plus hours to meet a seventeen pound canine. 

I knew as soon as I waved to him as he pulled out of the driveway that I should have gone along with him.

Sure enough, I got the call later that evening—my husband was coming home, picking me up, and we were going back together for an all-inclusive family meet and greet.  No sense fighting it.  It was a done deal.

In the car, I felt a bleeding, tearful sense of disloyalty to our first pup—we had had him as a puppy, he was named by the students I taught, he went with us on every vacation and he celebrated each holiday with us.  No dog on the planet could ever meld into our hearts with such princely devotion.  I gave the idea of any new dog the Simon Cowell “no” vote.

When we at last got to the center to finally see the dogs, we were denied admission.  There had been a bit of a heat wave, and for three rough days the staff had been trying to keep the dogs as calm and non-agitated as possible until air conditioning and power were restored.  We explained, in a hard sell, that we had driven four hours plus, etc.  They acquiesced and snuck this beagle dog, whose name my husband couldn’t remember, to see us outside.  Of course, this little bow-legged cowboy waddled up gleefully to my better half.  I still wanted to think about his adoption overnight.

We spent the evening at my sister-in-law’s and discussed his adoption.  But, when we left him there at the kennel, I felt like a Mom dropping my abandoned baby off on the first day of school.  Even so, I still craved some kind of otherworldly sign that we all were an irrefutable, undeniable family match. 

In the morning we went to pick up our new addition.  When we arrived, and with the great flourish of sudden memory, my husband confidently announced,  “We’re here to pick up Cosmo.”  Like a lightning rod and all at once, the power and air conditioning units began to hum with efficiency, and then I knew…

my Rainbow Bridge First Boy had given me the sign, and gave us the patience to embrace our newest dog baby, whose name remained the supremely celestial Cosmo.

  

On: Teacher Tales--Email Logs, Volume 2

Teacher Tales:
A Compilation of Email Logs From
A Public High School Teacher, Volume 2

A Primer For the Secretary of Education's 
Review and Consideration

Entry #14…

“Incident at Dismissal”

April 25, 2014 8:10 AM 

From one of our building administrators:

“Staff:

Today at dismissal from our testing day an incident occurred south of  ***th and ******** Avenue.  There were reports of multiple gunshots fired.  Since this was during dismissal, there were many students outside of the building.  Security and staff that were outside quickly began a reverse evacuation of the building, and got the students back into the building as quickly and orderly as possible.  Once the area was secured by the ****** and ******* police, we loaded the buses and released them for their normal routes.  After the buses were cleared, we released the walkers.  At this time, we do not have any more information regarding the incident.  

Tomorrow we are asking staff to be diligent in their monitoring of the hallways, as well as the rest of the building.  We will be on a no pass policy except for call slips.  We do have a few teachers scheduled to participate in a function with their classes 3^rd period, but that should be the only deviation from the policy.  We will also be conducting a search tomorrow morning before first and second periods.  We will try to complete these searches as quickly as possible  so that they do not impact your lessons.  As always, if you hear anything that you believe may be valuable information, please forward it to myself or the deans.

Thank you…”

Entry #15

“Stolen Phone Recon”

February 25, 2014 1:23 PM

"Hi, Hon,

My student R. told a funny story in class today.  His best friend, M., had his phone stolen.  So, rather than go to the police, the boys decide to take matters into their own hands and trace the phone.  Their detective work leads them to a specific house…did they call the police at this point to report the stolen phone’s location??? Of course not. 

M. goes up to the door and knocks.  Some people answer the door, and the boys tell the residents their suspicions.  The people at the door deny knowing anything about the phone, until R. dials the phone’s number, and the distinctive dog barking ring tone is heard from INSIDE THE HOUSE, hence confirming the boys’ investigative work. 

The boys tell the people at the door, “look, we just want the phone back, and we want to know who took it.”  First, the residents deny any knowledge of the thief’s identity.  The boys persist, so one of the residents finally tells them...

“I think the name of the n****r who took your phone is...TRAYVON MARTIN”, abruptly slamming the door in the boys’ faces.  The boys, incensed at the disrespectful Trayvon reference and still phoneless, now attempt to break the door of the house open. 

The outcome for both of my student detectives…arrests and court dates for disorderly conduct.  Still feeling somewhat vindicated, though, because M. got his phone back.

No one (including Trayvon) was ultimately charged with the phone’s theft, however.

Entry # 16

“Concealed Carry”

February 4, 2014 2:17 PM

Memo:

“To:  All Staff
From:  Director of Safety and Security
RE:  Concealed Carry Law 430 ILCS 66/65

“Illinois’ concealed carry law was passed recently and allows individual to apply for licenses to carry a concealed firearm.  However, carrying a concealed weapon is prohibited in school buildings and on school grounds.” 

Entry #17

“Musical Chairs”

January 8, 2014 11:23 AM

Hi, Hon,

Part 1:

They made a change in my schedule, which I found out by looking at a student’s schedule.  It isn’t that big of a deal, but a courtesy communique would have been nice…

Part 2:

They moved my 4/5 period class to 5/6, subsequently disbanding some of the students in the 4/5 class.  Some went to another teacher, and some were dispersed to my 2^nd or 11^th periods.  I am upset because that 4/5 period class was really close knit and hard-working…it was one of the best Spanish 2 classes I had had in years.

No one bothered to give me any advanced administrative notification—again, I found out when a student showed me a change on his schedule, and then I confirmed on Power Teacher.  My free and lunch periods are now different as well—a heads up would have been appreciated.

Side note:  The Human Resource Department forwarded a newsletter today regarding the topic of effective communication with colleagues…I know where I’d like to forward a copy…

Part 3

I just found out that two of my best students, who are sisters, are leaving to transfer to another district today.

I don’t ever remember a second semester with this many switches.

Part 4

But on a more positive note, I finally found my classroom chair.  Apparently, there is a chop shop for stolen office equipment here at school.  Here's my photographic evidence to turn state’s evidence. 

Jeez, teachers stealing other teachers’ chairs to get parts for their broken ones.  Cold a$$ thugs.

Entry #18

“State of Grace”

September 24, 2013 12:10 PM

Hi, Hon,

“Our bosses requested us to stay a little later today for a faculty meeting.  The state consultants are giving us a report on their visit to our campus…”

Entry #19

“Flame Wars”

September 19, 2013 11:30 AM

“Hi, Hon,

A colleague threw some of us under the bus today. She sent a complaint email to our supervisors over the work we did on curriculum, exam prep, and textbook selections...

…of course, the colleague doing the complaining has only been to ONE planning meeting in two full years.”

Entry #20

“Chaperone-y Baloney”

September 9, 2013 8:53 AM

Memo:

“The Back to School Jam scheduled for Friday, September 13, 2013, has been rescheduled for Saturday, September 14, 2013 from 12-4 pm.

As per your contractual language, since this activity is being rescheduled, you are, therefore given exemption status as far as having served your chaperone assignment.”

Yeah, I went anyway.  But you knew I would.

Entry #21

“You’re Suspended”

September 9, 2013 7:58 AM

“Hi, Hon,

…just got back from Attendance Office
Supervision…whew…the lines were out the door for tardy passes.  I am trying to re-learn the ID scanner.   

Thankfully, I did not suspend anyone accidentally today…

Ironically, for the next two Thursdays after school, I’ve got professional development workshops on BRAIN BOOSTS.”